Day Fifteen: F This

This is how I feel right now:

This is what I've consumed so far. I can't guarantee that I won't drink another beer.

Totals	1,618	199	18	26	1,454	27
Your Daily Goal	1,200	150	40	60	2,300	45
Remaining	-418	-49	22	34	846	18
	Calories	Carbs	Fat	Protein	Sodium	Sugar

My dad's whole (NJ) side of the family came over to my parents' house for pasta dinner tonight. My Nana has been staying up here since Thanksgiving and she is going back home next weekend, so I wanted to see her before she left. We also did a little celebration for my brother's 25th birthday, which is at the end of the month.

I knew that we were having pasta, so I avoided eating before I went over there. The Cymbalta I was prescribed leaves me so thirsty, I probably had 6 waters before I got here, but I was starving. 

When I arrived, my mom informed me that there was cheese out in the other room. I guess I was already in a mood when I woke up, so I basically yelled, "I'm not eating cheese!" Then there was some brief back and forth about my current dietary habits, until I finally made it clear that I am doing this for my health: I feel a lot better and I've already lost almost 4 lbs (I'm back down to my pre-taco night weight). She was satisfied with that.

I had some giardinara, a few crackers, and some black olives to hold me over until dinner (it was about 3:00 when we started our snacking). Then I realized something horrible: my mom bought craft beer for the occasion. Brooklyn Lager (does that count?) and two kinds of Southern Tier. My parents are faithful Coors Light drinkers when it comes to beer, with the exception of Samuel Smith's Winter Welcome Ale in the colder months. Of course I had to try a Phin & Matt's APA. 162 calories. Not too bad.

The first course was Caesar salad. I made sure not to get any croutons and I didn't add anchovies (obvi) or cheese. I used a light balsamic vinaigrette. And I grabbed a piece of Italian bread because it's not everyday I get goods from Italian People's Bakery. At this point, my brother observes, "How do you know that bread doesn't have milk or eggs in it?" Why did I assume that bread was safe? UGH. Whatever. 

I had plans tonight and at this point, it was clear that I was getting stood up. It's amazing that I didn't swallow four meatballs whole. I don't think I can convey how amazing my mom's family's recipe for meatballs is. I have some friends who have been lucky enough to try them, and they seriously don't stop moaning while they eat. I'm really trying to avoid making this sound sexual, and I think I'm failing. I'll put it plainly: I've never had a meatball that can hold a candle to my mom's. They could be classified as Schedule 1 drugs.

The main course was rigatoni with my mom's equally fabulous sauce. Here's the rub: After cooking her meatballs and several other kinds of meat, like sausage, short ribs, pork, and sometimes rabbit, my mom puts the meat in the sauce while it cooks. When I was home on Friday, every inch of counter space was covered in thawing meat. When I asked if she could so kindly make a small pot of sauce without meat, she said no. Did I mention I come from a very stubborn family? I debated showing up with a jar of Francsco Rinaldi, but I didn't want to get hit with a wooden spoon. We've never had store-bought sauce in my house.

I had a generous serving of rigatoni - probably more than I logged in - and sucked it up and had the sauce (my mom takes all of the meat out and puts it in separate serving dishes, but I know that that doesn't make it vegan-friendly). I was even disciplined enough to shove aside the tiny pieces of magical meatballs I found in my sauce. I did have another piece of Italian bread because I was like "f everything" at this point. I also had a Southern Tier 2X IPA, which is a lovely 246 calories. 

No photo could do this justice

I did resist birthday cake and apple pie. I had a black coffee, which I forgot to log in, but that's negligible. 

I am going to go sulk with my Sam Adams Winter Lager and try to resist having another. I do have three things left to say, though: 

1) Overall, the support I've received has been overwhelmingly awesome and encouraging. Thank you guys!!!

2) Because I feel that I slipped a few times over the course of a few days, I am extending my 21-day pledge to 24 days. Instead of ending on January 25 (which is going to be a very challenging day, since I'm heading to Asbury Park Beerfest), I will end on January 28.

3) I am enjoying this mixtape way more than I expected to:

4) I made sure to take home 5 meatballs to put in my freezer for whenever I decide to stop being vegan. :)

5) Two week juice cleanse starts tomorrow!