Day Fifteen: F This

This is how I feel right now:

This is what I've consumed so far. I can't guarantee that I won't drink another beer.

Totals	1,618	199	18	26	1,454	27
Your Daily Goal	1,200	150	40	60	2,300	45
Remaining	-418	-49	22	34	846	18
	Calories	Carbs	Fat	Protein	Sodium	Sugar

My dad's whole (NJ) side of the family came over to my parents' house for pasta dinner tonight. My Nana has been staying up here since Thanksgiving and she is going back home next weekend, so I wanted to see her before she left. We also did a little celebration for my brother's 25th birthday, which is at the end of the month.

I knew that we were having pasta, so I avoided eating before I went over there. The Cymbalta I was prescribed leaves me so thirsty, I probably had 6 waters before I got here, but I was starving. 

When I arrived, my mom informed me that there was cheese out in the other room. I guess I was already in a mood when I woke up, so I basically yelled, "I'm not eating cheese!" Then there was some brief back and forth about my current dietary habits, until I finally made it clear that I am doing this for my health: I feel a lot better and I've already lost almost 4 lbs (I'm back down to my pre-taco night weight). She was satisfied with that.

I had some giardinara, a few crackers, and some black olives to hold me over until dinner (it was about 3:00 when we started our snacking). Then I realized something horrible: my mom bought craft beer for the occasion. Brooklyn Lager (does that count?) and two kinds of Southern Tier. My parents are faithful Coors Light drinkers when it comes to beer, with the exception of Samuel Smith's Winter Welcome Ale in the colder months. Of course I had to try a Phin & Matt's APA. 162 calories. Not too bad.

The first course was Caesar salad. I made sure not to get any croutons and I didn't add anchovies (obvi) or cheese. I used a light balsamic vinaigrette. And I grabbed a piece of Italian bread because it's not everyday I get goods from Italian People's Bakery. At this point, my brother observes, "How do you know that bread doesn't have milk or eggs in it?" Why did I assume that bread was safe? UGH. Whatever. 

I had plans tonight and at this point, it was clear that I was getting stood up. It's amazing that I didn't swallow four meatballs whole. I don't think I can convey how amazing my mom's family's recipe for meatballs is. I have some friends who have been lucky enough to try them, and they seriously don't stop moaning while they eat. I'm really trying to avoid making this sound sexual, and I think I'm failing. I'll put it plainly: I've never had a meatball that can hold a candle to my mom's. They could be classified as Schedule 1 drugs.

The main course was rigatoni with my mom's equally fabulous sauce. Here's the rub: After cooking her meatballs and several other kinds of meat, like sausage, short ribs, pork, and sometimes rabbit, my mom puts the meat in the sauce while it cooks. When I was home on Friday, every inch of counter space was covered in thawing meat. When I asked if she could so kindly make a small pot of sauce without meat, she said no. Did I mention I come from a very stubborn family? I debated showing up with a jar of Francsco Rinaldi, but I didn't want to get hit with a wooden spoon. We've never had store-bought sauce in my house.

I had a generous serving of rigatoni - probably more than I logged in - and sucked it up and had the sauce (my mom takes all of the meat out and puts it in separate serving dishes, but I know that that doesn't make it vegan-friendly). I was even disciplined enough to shove aside the tiny pieces of magical meatballs I found in my sauce. I did have another piece of Italian bread because I was like "f everything" at this point. I also had a Southern Tier 2X IPA, which is a lovely 246 calories. 

No photo could do this justice

I did resist birthday cake and apple pie. I had a black coffee, which I forgot to log in, but that's negligible. 

I am going to go sulk with my Sam Adams Winter Lager and try to resist having another. I do have three things left to say, though: 

1) Overall, the support I've received has been overwhelmingly awesome and encouraging. Thank you guys!!!

2) Because I feel that I slipped a few times over the course of a few days, I am extending my 21-day pledge to 24 days. Instead of ending on January 25 (which is going to be a very challenging day, since I'm heading to Asbury Park Beerfest), I will end on January 28.

3) I am enjoying this mixtape way more than I expected to:

4) I made sure to take home 5 meatballs to put in my freezer for whenever I decide to stop being vegan. :)

5) Two week juice cleanse starts tomorrow!

Day Four

There are quite a few things that I'm not doing well with in the new year, and waking up for work is one of them. According to my Sleep Cycle app, I should be waking up around 5:15 or 5:20. According to sanity, no. I not only turned off the app and slept until my emergency clock radio 6 AM wake up call, I snoozed until 6:08. I should probably stop staying up and overdosing on Netflix, but last night I decided to start Coming to America at 10, soooo...(Side note: Subways in 1988...!!!)

Here are today's totals:

Fats: 25 g
Carbs: 250 g
Protein: 55 g
Calories: 1,323 ...but I burned a whopping 42 at physical therapy, giving me a net of 1,280!

aaaaand Ziplocs! wooooooooo!

Oh, yeah, that's another thing I'm not doing well with in 2014...getting to the gym. But it's so collllllld, and I didn't even get done with physical therapy until close to sevvvvveennnn (read in a whiny voice). To make matters worse, I went to Target instead of the gym...but I needed food storage contaaaaainers and extra measuring spoooooons! (I also stood in the cheese aisle like I was sneaking a peek at a peep show).

I'm not going to include individual nutrition facts for any of today's meals. Although miércoles is usually la noche de los tacos, today was el día de las sobras. (Side note: Two new years resolutions I should have: A) Avoid Target at all costs, B) Pick up Duolingo again).

Breakfast: Banana oatmeal bite, standard coffee/almond milk

I popped this in the microwave for 15 seconds and then another 15 seconds and it was much better. The outside was still a little dry because I flubbed up the recipe but...

Lunch: Guacamole quinoa and arugula 

This was actually really good mixed together with arugula and served cold. The reviews on the recipe website were right; this tastes even better the next day because it gives the flavors time to come together. As has become the norm, I was too full to finish it so I probably only ate half. I saved the rest and as has always been the norm, I was hungry again by my "break" at 2 PM. I polished the rest of this off then. Side note: Along with the other flavors, the onion gets even more pungent on Day 2. It's a good idea to have gum on hand, or to have coworkers who have gum on hand who don't want to smell your stank breath (sorry, guys). 

Snack #1 (I worked a longer day today so I needed extra snacks): Bakery on Main Chocolate Almond Granola Bar

These made their way in to work with all of the post-holiday goodies, and I hid one on my desk because I saw that it was vegan! I've been craving chocolate something awful and this granola bar saaaaaaaaved me. It was so good and it's also gluten-free. I definitely need to check out more products from Bakery on Main (I was tempted by their gluten-free granola at Target...but they're also an expensive line). This bar - and I believe the granola as well - had only 140 calories (sure beats the 360 calorie Special K bars I was scarfing down).

Snack #2: Zucchini and Hummus

I hate zucchini. I love hummus. Together, they work. I made sure that I coated each strip of zucchini in a wad of hummus so big that it was all I could taste. 

Dinner: Moroccan bean stew and couscous

Maybe it's not just chocolate I'm craving, but sweets. The cinnamon in this stew gives some, but not enough. I thought that golden raisins would be awesome on top of this, but I don't have any. I threw about two tablespoons of low sugar Craisins in and it helped. You know what I don't like in this? Fennel seeds. Yuck, yuck, yuck. Never again. 

Well, this was short and boring, but I'm going to try to get to bed earlier tonight. Maybe I'll let Sleep Cycle control my morning. Or maybe I'll let a marathon of Freaks & Geeks control my night (if it results in dreams of James Franco, I'll settle for the latter). 

Calories: Zero

Day Three: Part One

Picture every minor annoyance and exacerbate it by a windchill of -17 degrees. That is my day: waking up to an inefficient heating system that has my apartment at 60 degrees, cat puke on the tear-out of snack ideas from Real Simple (I'll spare you the picture), dressing in four layers (literally), a coffee machine that doesn't feel like working, tire pressure alerts upon arriving to work, all of the things that happen at work, having to park a mile away from the doctor's office because of inefficient parking lots, temper tantrums that result in expensive things breaking, coming home to an inefficient heating system that has my apartment at 59 degrees...you get the picture. I guess I won't be taking my shoes or two jackets off any time soon. I'm too cold to even go in the bathroom to pee (or to go anywhere else to pee, unless it's Tahiti). My laptop keyboard is freezing. And to top this all off, today (post-lunch) I was huuuuungry. I'm still hungry. I can't stop thinking about tacos. And pizza. OMG, give me cheese. Then I'm like, oh yeah, this is what getting dressed feels like: 

Nope, not wearing that

Okay, now I'm guiltily looking at pictures of cheese online like it's porn. I am turning into that guy from Portlandia (in more ways than one; can we discuss brunch now?). I was going to have leftovers for dinner, but I think I need to cook something to get my mind off of...well, food. At least I'll get to stand near a hot stove. Maybe I'll even get to take off one of my jackets!

My Inspiration

I am a little girl. I'm embellishing when I say that I'm 5'3". I didn't break 100 lbs. until after high school graduation. When I got my drivers license, my best friend and I made a pact to eat at McDonald's every day, partially because we wanted to gain weight and partially because we were just gross, apparently (oh, and there was nothing else to do in the suburbs besides eat junk and hang out in parking lots). 

I'm not saying any of this to brag (however, as I've told Laura, I think Morgan Spurlock owes us something for stealing our idea which, by the way, did not last very long). I'm saying this because as I'm nearing thirty, my metabolism has suddenly hit a wall and I have packed on more pounds in the past year than I ever have. I can't fit into most of my clothes, I don't feel good about the way I look, and I just feel gross, health-wise. 

As I'm writing this, my brother posts this on Facebook: A Science Teacher Lost 37 Pounds From Eating Nothing But McDonald’s. 

OK, back to the point: I'm tired of being a tomato on toothpicks (another term Laura and I came up with to describe small-framed people with skinny limbs and bigger guts). And okay, maybe those bottom toothpicks are getting less toothpicky. I'm tired of almost always having a stomachache. I decided to make a serious change to my diet and keep track of my progress here: I'm hopping on the 21-day-vegan bandwagon (maybe the bandwagon is 22 days; I don't know, ask Bey-Z).

Did I mention that I'm incredibly lazy, terrible at follow through, and I'm obsessed with bacon and cheese?  Like, I could live on this:

Photo Cred: Just Putzing Around the Kitchen, which just went on my Bookmarks bar

Hopefully blogging will keep me motivated. I'm also one of those a-holes who constantly takes pictures of food, so this provides a legit outlet for that. 

Now I'm going to go take a nap because it's too damn dreary to go to the gym today.