FAILFAILFAILFAIL

A look back at 2014...two months later.

On December 31, 2013, I made these "resolutions": 

1. Keep a food diary

2. Keep a spending diary

3. January

     A. Vegan diet Jan. 5-25

     B. Only drink 1X/week

4. Say no more often - even to yourself!

5. Gym at least 3X/week: cardio 3X, arms, legs, abs

6. Read at least one book per month - alternate fiction, non-fiction

7. Start a positivity jar

8. Try something new each month

9. STICK TO MEAL PLAN AND SHOPPING LISTS!

10. AM: News? Vits, supplements

      PM: Moisturize, brush, floss, rinse

11. Write everyday

+ 1 other that I am going to keep private. Gotta save something for myself!

Gosh, I was cute back then. So naive. So innocent. So idealistic. 

I've failed at most of these.

1: I've been using MyFitnessPal almost every day, but I fell off for about a week and I'm about to give up until Monday again. There have been many days when I counted calories, but went way, way, way over my limit, which kind of defeats the purpose. Plus I've gained back half the weight that I lost and I'm on track to gaining the other half, too.

2: I've been pretty good about this since January, although it's easy to forget transactions when I don't get a receipt or when I pay cash (I typically only keep track of ATM withdrawals and debit card usage). However, just because I'm writing down my spending habits doesn't mean I'm sticking to any sort of budget or saving my money. And I certainly haven't been keeping track of credit card purchases. Again, the purpose has been defeated. I'm still counting down the days until the next pay day...sometimes on pay day.

I'm like...

When I should be like...

3. A) We know by now that my vegan experiment was - generally - a success. However, since the Super Bowl, I've had a very hard time being disciplined enough not to cheat - often - when I'm hanging out with friends. I've been more social than usual and dining out more often this month, which increases the challenge. And even when I'm keeping vegan, that doesn't mean I'm keeping within my calorie goals (like last night's 3 vegan tacos, margaritas, and a giant vegan chipwich). 

B) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That lasted until I had a 3-day weekend for Martin Luther King Day. I have a dream that one day craft beer will be low in calories.

Some days after work, I'd think

But I'd resist. And then on Friday, I'd be like

And then, even though I reached my one day quota, on Saturday, I'd say

And then eventually, work days turned into this:

...leading me to this:

4. I haven't really been keeping track of this one. I feel spread very thin, so I'm probably not practicing this one, either. I think the only thing I've said no to is the gym.

5. ...speaking of the gym. I think I've gone 3 times this year. I'm too tired and I feel like I never even get the chance to sit down. Plus, if I don't start on a Monday, the entire week is shot.

6. So far, so good, but I know that I am not going to finish my current read in the next 2 days. UGH. Check off another failure.

7. I contributed to my positivity jar until early February. Most of my notes were stupid and in order to remember where I left off, I'd have to dump them all out and read them. Meh. 

http://jubilantlybeautiful.wordpress.com/

I also started a money jar, although I never made that an "official" resolution. However, when I left my wallet at work, I "borrowed" from the money jar to buy beer and vegan cupcakes. I never paid it back or added more cash and now I owe it $45.

8. Remember when I signed up for a Constitutional Law course at Yale on Courseara? I've deleted every e-mail they've sent me. I don't think I've tried anything new this year, unless foods count. Oh wait, that's kind of a lie. Also, blogging and letting people actually read it is something new. Okay, so I've kind of succeeded at this one.

9. I will never stick to meal plans and shopping lists. First of all, they suck to make. Secondly, meal plans are hard when my days - and my cravings - are unpredictable. Something that tastes delicious on Tuesday may sound unappetizing on Wednesday. And how am I supposed to resist things like cookie dough and marshmallow Oreos? I'm clearly never going to put those on my shopping list, but when they are on sale for 2/$6, they're going in my cart. (Oreos are vegan, BTW).

10. I rarely have time to turn on the news in the morning and I stopped taking vitamins because they were making me nauseated. I will moisturize my face at night when it feels dry, but I somehow missed a nightly brush-floss-rinse session and I never got back into the habit. I fail at hygiene, too. I know, I'm gross. I'm going to be a wrinkly toothless old woman.

11. I had been journaling every night before bed, but it was more like a logbook of my "progress." Then I figured that blogging every day certainly counted as writing. And then I even got lazy with this and I'm not blogging every day. Doing something compulsory every day makes it feel like work and I want to keep this fun.

Some Things and Some Stuff

After ripping my last contact lens in Pittsburgh, I pulled out my phone to call my eye doctor and order a new box. I scrolled down to "D" for "Dr. Geri Bauer" (first name necessary because I used to see a Dr. Bauers when I lived with my parents...7 years ago. Okay, no longer necessary). 

"How many doctors is it appropriate for a 29-year-old woman to have in her phone?" I asked Tom (shout out). 

"If you have any more than 6, there's something wrong," he said.

I have 8. And a physical therapist. There's something wrong. And it's eating up too much of my time. 

I tutored right after work today and then rushed to my appointment with my rheumatologist. I waited for so long I had to cancel my next appointment, which was with my physical therapist. The bottom line: All of these mediocre health "issues" are taking up way too much of my time. 

The rheumatologist stands by his initial diagnosis of fibromyalgia, which I had hoped was maybe a bit premature. I definitely have hip bursitis, which is the only thing that's currently bothering me. Bursitis, he says, is actually common in people with fibro. So, according to him, the pain in my hip is a symptom, not the actual issue.

Since my stomach is still reeling from my weekend and my late-night hankerings, I'm not only going to try to stick to a vegan diet, but I am going to be mindful of eating foods that also aid in anti-inflammation (is that the correct terminology?):

Minus the meat, dairy, and unlimited cooked Asian mushrooms

Going to the doctor today also meant an encounter with the dreaded scale, something I've avoided since around the Super Bowl. I asked the nurse if I could not look at the scale. I didn't. However, as she was putting information into the computer, she mentioned that I weighed less than I did at my last visit...I knew that, but I also know that I weigh more than I did at the peak of my weight loss...which was still shy of my ultimate goal. 

When she left the room, I quickly snuck on the scale before the doctor arrived. Okay, it's not so bad. I'm up 5 lbs, but that also means I'm still down 5 lbs. Some pants are too tight, but none are so tight that they actually feel shorter. My gut may feel bloated, but it's not as roll-y as it was before. There is still hope.

The new bottom line: I need to get back on the horse. That means: the weekends are my time for recreation, but that doesn't mean I can go crazy with food. I'm officially back on the vegan horse, which seems like an oxymoron (speaking of which, just found a leak of Schoolboy Q's new album...can't wait to see him in 2 weeks).  

Okay, that was slightly irrelevant. Time to get back on track in more ways than one:

MONDAY = GYM AND COUNTING CALORIES. This week doesn't count because Monday was a holiday. 

Not much interesting food news to post (other than I've been stuffing my face in bed late at night), but I did try to recreate my Pittsburgh golden oat smoothie yesterday. 

I made this with one banana, a cup (I think? It was too early for memories) of oats, a cup of almond milk, turmeric, cinnamon, and ginger. And ice. No perfume, although it's in the photo. The result: Too watery. Needs less milk and more banana. Do over!

I also managed to stay vegan at Surf Taco yesterday. 

Costa Rican burrito bowl, no cheese, add guac

I was also excited to come home to a case of Brad's Raw Crunchy Kale from Laura!!! (I think I ate 3 already).

Nom nom nom...my bestie is the best

I got back in the kitchen today, too, because I was inspired by some Simple Veganista recipes. 

For dinner today, I made roasted cauliflower and chickpeas with mustard dressing. 

This was very easy and much more tasty than I expected - I mixed a head of cauliflower (cut into florets) and a can of rinsed and drained garbanzo beans with 2 tablespoons of EVOO and some salt and roasted it at 400 degrees for 45 minutes (stirring every 15). I kept checking the recipe to see what I forgot. No seasonings?! Surely you must be mistaken, Simple Veganista!

Meanwhile, I prepared two very uninvolved things: a cup of quinoa on the stove and mustard dressing. The dressing calls for a tablespoon of Dijon mustard and a tablespoon of whole grain mustard, and of course I chose today to bring my Dijon mustard to work and leave it there (it's always something - but better mustard than my wallet). I used 2 tablespoons of whole grain Dijon mustard (mind-blowing, right? Thanks, Trader Joe), 3 tablespoons of lemon juice, and a tablespoon of EVOO. I mixed this dressing with the beans and cauli when they were done roasting and had cooled for a few minutes. Oh, I also chopped up very little parsley and mixed that in, too. Whenever I go to chop parsley, I'm like "Why the F did I buy this?! I hate this!" ...but it was pretty unnoticeable in this mustardy goodness (I could eat mustard with a spoon).

I don't have nutrition facts yet, but this is supposed to make 2 servings with some leftover quinoa (yeah, serve this on top of the quinoa, BTW). This was a great portion size, absolutely delicious, and sometimes sinus-clearing (and almost a parallel sentence). I give it an A.

I also finally made rustic apple and pear crisp. 

This was also really easy: wash, core, and dice 3 apples and 3 pears. If you're like me, laugh at yourself and how inept you are at coring and dicing things.

Mix with 3 tablespoons of lemon juice, a tablespoon of cornstarch, a tablespoon of sugar, and a heaping teaspoon of cinnamon (crap, I used a heaping tablespoon). This goes into a 9 x 9 baking pan...or, if you're like me, an 8 x 8 baking pan and also a loaf pan.

Then mix together 1 3/4 cup oats, a cup of chopped walnuts (crap, I bought a half cup...improvised with another half-ish cup of sliced almonds), 1/2 cup pure maple syrup, a teaspoon of vanilla extract (imitation for me), and some salt. This goes on top of the apple-pear mixture, but it didn't seem to make enough for me. The recipe calls for an optional 1/4 cup of almond meal and it probably needs it.

This bakes at 350 for 35-40 minutes. I went with 35 since the oven was still cooling down from 400 degrees.

No nutrition facts here, either, but this serves 6. I mean...one. Because I'm about to eat the whole thing in one sitting.

Traveling through Pittsburgh like a Fat Kid...I Mean, Foodie

I haven't been home in nearly a week, so this may be a long post! Although my flight to Nashville was canceled, we decided to risk a road trip to Pittsburgh rather than stay in New Jersey. Not only does my best friend (you must remember Laura!) live there with her husband, but this weekend happened to include the second Friday of the month - and the second Friday of the month is always Hungarian Cultural Night at my favorite restaurant ever, Jozsa Corner - I've been waiting nearly 5 years to go back. 

We hopped in the car at 2 PM on Thursday, stopping at Quick Check to pick up some snacks.

Of course I packed my kale chips - Vampire Killer was actually not garlicky enough for me - and I picked up some apple straws, Stacy's naked pita chips, and a Skinny Girl strawberry lemonade sparkling water (to die for) - I was going to at least remain vegan in the car!

We stopped somewhere in central Pennsylvania to refuel ourselves and the car, and to book our hotel (I wanted to wait until we were halfway there because I wasn't even sure that we would make it with the snow!). The only places to eat at the rest stop were Starbucks and Burger King and Starbucks didn't have any "real" food to offer. I settled for a chicken-cranberry-apple-blue cheese salad with apple cider vinaigrette. It was okay, minus the iceberg lettuce, but I could feel my stomach bubbling before I even got back in the car. It was an uncomfortable experience, both for my stomach and my ego - I feel like I got a lot of strange looks in the nearly-deserted rest stop. It may have been my leopard rain boots. I clearly do not fit in in Pennsyltucky. 

As soon as we arrived in the PGH, after some dicey driving through the dark mountains in the snow, we settled in the room and went to meet up with Laura and her husband, Dan. They took us to Kelly's Bar and Lounge, a very dinery dive bar, where I ordered a Gardenburger (with cheese) and fries. It was absolutely delicious, but the cheese and the grease caused even more rumbling. 

The rumbles continued into Friday morning. Our hotel was under renovation, so to make up for it, they were offering a free continental breakfast. We slept through it and met back up with Laura and Dan in the early afternoon.

We had decided to check out the Carnegie Museum, but first, Laura suggested we try a new - get this - vegan/vegetarian restaurant called AVA. 

AVA had not yet had their grand opening, but rather a soft opening. The small menu made decision-making easy.

And this fresh bread with wonderful garlicky amazing dipping oil was superb.

We ordered a round of golden oat smoothies - a delicious concoction of banana, oat, almond milk, turmeric, and cinnamon - that is meant to serve as a meal, but which turned into appetizers for us. I will definitely try to replicate this at home because it was incredible.

I ordered the tofu wrap, which was just as beautiful as it was delicious. Inside was herb marinated tofu, tomato, cucumber, kale, purple slaw, and green onion hummus (holy crap I need to make that, too). It came with chips and more purple slaw on the side. I was only able to eat half of this, but the other half came in handy as a late-night snack. Laura's spicy crunchy salad was delicious, too. None of us could stop talking about how good the food was and, perhaps more importantly, how good it was making us feel. My bubbling from the previous day's cheese and grease started to subside. I just felt - I don't know, clean. And energetic. And happy.

Then it was on to the Museum, where I took about 800 photos of modern art and dinosaurs. I will take this moment to share one of my favorite exhibits:

It was just random and hilarious. But for serious, this was probably my actual favorite - and maybe all of ours.

After touring the museum, we stopped at this really cool concept food kiosk called Conflict Kitchen. The kiosk "only serves food from countries with which the United States is in conflict. Each Conflict Kitchen iteration is augmented by events, performances, and discussions that seek to expand the engagement the public has with the culture, politics, and issues at stake within the focus country." Currently, Conflict Kitchen is serving North Korean fare and while I could have tried a million things, I settled on tofu pockets:

There is no indoor seating area and the outdoors were covered in snow, so we had to eat and walk. These were a little tricky to eat (the rice filling likes to fall out of the tofu pockets), but they were very good. The sauce on top (I forget what it was) was pretty spicy! But this held me over until dinner...the main event! 

HUNGARIAN NIGHT AHHHHHH RTKTKTKTK!!!!

It took me a few tries to get through to the restaurant to make reservations, but I was finally successful and hella excited. Jozsa Corner is tucked away in Hazelwood and almost unrecognizable from the street. You walk in through the kitchen, where you are greeted by the proprietor, Alex Bodnar, and then you sit family-style in the next room, which is filled with Hungarian tchotchkes, photographs, Alex's paintings, and a large piano.

Alex in his kitchen

The kitchen

Our first course is one of my favorite things - lángos, a Hungarian fried flat bread.

This lángos was served with something new to me - lecsó , a blend of stewed tomatoes, onions, and peppers. And heaven.

The next course was something I didn't think I'd like - halászlé, which is "fisherman's stew."

I hate fish, but this was amazing. The dill and hot paprika helped balance out the flavors, and it didn't taste "fishy" at all.

Next up was haluska and homemade hot kolbasz. This was probably some of the best haluska I've ever had - I made some not too long ago and the thought of the leftovers in my freezer makes me a little nauseated. Mine was too cabbagey and buttery. This recipe was not greasy or oily at all, and it seemed like the onions and cabbage were equally represented. And don't even get me started on how much I hate spicy sausage - however, this kolbasz (similar to kielbasa, just like haluska is very similar to haluski) was magnificent (I'm running out of positive adjectives).

The next course has been one of my favorite foods since childhood: szekely gulyas (also known as Transylvania goulash). It's a goulash made with pork and sauerkraut, and I always begged my Nana to make it for me whenever I went to visit her.

Don't tell Nana, but Alex may have won this cook-off. The goulash juices went well with homemade poppy seed bread (Laura says Alex even grinds his own flour). I even brought an order home, but it's so much better fresh and hot off the stove.

One of the last courses was chicken paprikash with cucumber salad - both amazing. Fresh sour cream and fresh dill rule.

The final course - dessert - was kiflis with dried fruit and chocolate chips. There was not even a speck of powdered sugar left on the plate when we were done with it.

The food was phenomenal, but the company was even better. It was so great to have Valentine's Day dinner with my BFFF.

Late night, I noshed on the other half of my tofu wrap and some snacks from the hotel lobby - Reese's peanut butter cups and I don't even remember what else. I was clearly hell bent on undoing all of the good I did to my body at lunch.

On Saturday, we did wake up in time for breakfast...but there wasn't much to offer. I grabbed a steaming hot bowl that must have been fresh out of the dishwasher, poured myself some Cinnamon Toast Crunch (can't go wrong with that) and skim milk, which immediately warmed up with the bowl and was gross.

I can't remember the last time I had cow's milk, so it would have been weird even if it wasn't warm. We somehow learned that you could get bacon, eggs, and potatoes if you asked a grumpy man, so Tom ordered a hot breakfast and the grumpy man brought me one, too. 

Fiiiiiiine, I'll eat your bacon

Then it was on to the Strip District! 

We sampled at a few different places - I had a white chocolate macadamia biscotti and chocolate dipped macaroon at Enrico Biscotti Bakery and Cafe and I tried the cheesy garlic bread popcorn at Pittsburgh Popcorn. Then it was on to some serious eats at the highly-recommended and Andrew Zimmern-visited S & D Polish Deli.

I ordered the meatless platter, which we all shared, which came with three pierogies, haluski, and two potato pancakes. The haluski was good, although Alex's haluska is better (this one had more cabbage). The pierogies were incredible - I've never had fresh pierogies before. The potato pancakes were greasy and delicious. However, the sour cream may have stolen the spotlight - it was sweet and unlike anything I've ever tasted before. Any of my Polish or Eastern European friends know what this might be?

Our last stop was Edgar's Tacos, where I enjoyed a delicious and fresh chicken taco. 

Pittsburgh involves a lot of eating and walking. I'm okay with that.

Later that night, we went to...a MONSTER TRUCK RALLY!!! I'm not even kidding. It was hilarious. I don't have a picture of the rubbery, overpriced stadium chicken fingers and fries I ate, but I do have this video of the Gravedigger:

After our monster truck shenanigans, we stopped at Mad Mex, where I enjoyed a margarita and some fried tofu that seemed more Asian than Mexican. 

The night ended in more late night snacks, even though I swear I wasn't really hungry - peanut M&Ms and pizza Combos.

I vowed to hit the gym and start eating healthy again on Monday, and here it is, Tuesday. I am about 400 calories under my limit so I'm going to go have a beer and still not go to the gym. 

I can say with confidence that after about a week of straight bubble guts and crankiness, I will be resuming my strict veganity. :)